Monday, June 20, 2011

Decisions.

Things here have been pretty quiet lately. That is because I have been thinking and deciding on something very difficult. Something that is completely heartbreaking- even if I know it is the right thing to do. I have officially decided to rehome Kieran. I love him enough to want to see him have a better quality of life. He shouldn't have to live in a crate&rotate situation. He deserves constant love and attention that I cannot provide for him. This decision wasn't made lightly. I do truly love him and that is why I am going to do what is right and best for my Special K.
It's been so ingrained into my mind that when you take in a dog that they are family. You don't just give up on family. Sometimes I honestly do feel like I am giving up on him. On us as a family. But sometimes you have to  provide your family with a better life by letting them go and be loved by a new family. I will never stop loving him. I know I am going to miss him. I love his spunky attitude. Valkyrie might even miss him- just not in the same way I will.
Valkyrie has shown to me that she would prefer to be an only dog. Her happiness has been compromised by Kieran's presence. I am just trying to restore a happy balance. Kieran won't suffer from the extra love and attention he is going to receive with his new family. Valkyrie will be happy to have her mom back 100% since she is a spoiled princess. My emotions go back and forth on this. My heart will break giving him up but it will be healed by the fact that he will be loved by a new family.

I feel guilty. I feel selfish. I feel like crying. I feel like I am letting people down. I feel like I am giving up-taking the easy road. I feel like this is the right thing to do.